Mysterion's Mysterious Return
by cornholio4
Summary: One week after the SP episode the Coon. Mysterion returns after using Kyle as a decoy to keep his identity safe and the Coon is not pleased at all! Features who I think is Mysterion! Oneshot & Complete!


1 week after Mysterion revealed his identity,

One night in the South Park Police Station Sergeant Yates the commissioner of the police department was working on some paper work when out through the window was...........Mysterion holding a tied up guy.

Mysterion said in his grouchy voice "here is that guy who was harassing Mexicans at the theatre, Sergeant Yates!"

The entire department was in shock about this and Yates jumped up from his desk and said "Mysterion? But who is.............."

He sees from one of the cells Kyle Broflovski was revealed to be Mysterion (or at least in the Mysterion costume when he revealed his identity).

Mysterion said "last week Kyle agreed to be a decoy Mysterion and in my costume revealed his "identity" as a decoy. I decided to retire with my true identity secret but I could not go by another day seeing my city crumble without me!"

One of the police officers released Kyle from his cell and said "you are free to go!"

Mysterion then went out of the window and said "I'll be back with more news about crime around here!"

Yates said tearfully "glad to have you back on the streets Mysterion!"

That morning Cartman in his room on his computer was downloading onto disc form the finished test film of **Coon: the Movie** a straight to DVD movie he made (just like the one he made in Dancing with Smurfs) starring himself as the Coon (Cartman trying to be smart and not give his "secret identity" away made the movie only to take place at night so we would not get into the other part of the Coon's double life) and Butters as Professor Chaos (though he did not know Butters really was Chaos.)

Cartman was thinking "download is almost complete! Once I am copy this disk into a gazillion copies I can sell them and make a bundle I can use to make the sequel!"

He was then looking at a drawing he made intending it to be on the front cover of the DVD. It showed him as the Coon at the back of him looking at South Park from a giant window in a large building. (Like one of the posters of the Dark Knight)

Once the download was finished Cartman decided to take a break and watch the news downstairs and when he turned on the TV he got a big shock.

Tom the news reporter said "news is that Mysterion has returned! It seems it has been revealed that Kyle Broflovski who was revealed to be Mysterion last week has turned out to be a decoy and that the real Mysterion has returned to continue his quest to rid the city of crime..........."

Cartman the angrily turned off the TV.

That night on the same Wallgreens rooftop as before was Cartman in his Coon persona.

(The italics is Cartman narrating in his head like the voiceover in the Coon episode)

_So Kyle was not Mysterion!!!!!!!!!_

_So Mysterion cheated his way out of revealing his identity by having that goddamn Jew Kyle be his decoy!_

_I must postpone everything until my war with Mysterion is over!_

_That includes trying to think of a way to stop the rapist plot the mayor and her lesbian lover is involved in,_

_And even though I do not want to I have to postpone finishing Coon: the movie!_

_I must get Kyle........_

_And I must destroy Mysterion once and for all....._

_I alone am the symbol this town can stand behind,_

_Not that copycat Mysterion,_

_I can easily think of a new plan to trick the real Mysterion into revealing his identity............._

_But he will just find a way to weasel out of doing that again......_

_I must physically and mentally destroy him!!!!!!_

_For I am the Coon.............._

_The Angel of Darkness being a guardian angel to South Park........_

_I am the Messiah sent to save this town-_

He then heard a girl's voice say "looks mommy there's Bruch Vilanche in a squirrel costume!"

Coon angrily bent over and showed his middle finger at the girl and began swearing at her worst than the Tourettes Guy.

Meanwhile in Kyle's room Kyle was talking to Mysterion.

Mysterion said "I just want to say thank you Kyle for being a loyal sidekick!"

Kyle said to him "don't mention it Mysterion! Like what I last week I am willing to do whatever it takes to help you in your war against crime!"

Mysterion then went out of Kyle's window leaving him to think "I sure wish he will tell me who he really is!"

Mysterion then went through the window of his own bedroom in his own house. He changed out of his costume and hid it in the loose floorboards in his room underneath a carpet. He then changed into his pyjamas and went into his bed.

Then a women's voice is heard saying "Stan I heard a noise! Is everything alright?"

He then smiled and said "yes mum, everything is fine!"

**That is it! I really do think Mysterion was Stan (S****outhpark dot wikia dot com slash wiki**** slash Mysterion shows reasons why I think that, mainly because he was the only of the kids who had access to fireworks through his uncle Jimbo) and I do think Kyle was a decoy otherwise his interaction with Mysterion had no point over than discluding Kyle in the list of Mysterion suspects! **


End file.
